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not the stop and start like it has for the last couple of weeks, the true torrential downpour, the seems like the heavens are crying. i can hear it beating on the roof of the building. constantly, i love that sound but it makes me so sad, i can run out and run about and feel the rain against my face and i can’t curl up in bed and whisper sweet nothings as the rain sounds plays it accompaniment. 

there is still nothing for me to do here at work and my boss has left me in charge, so being the exlemplar, i can’t duck work now, walk home in the rain, dump my wet clothes on the floor and crawl into bed. 

i’m seeing the edge of the black pit of despair and hearing it’s siren song. i should go work on the screenplay as promised, but i don’t have the energy. 

look forward to the weekend a voice in my head whispers (you know you have them too, so don’t give me that look, when you start having conversations with them, then worry), i’m going to a party tomorrow and then going to finish (or at least continue) my tattoo, on saturday. it’s also a f1 weekend, so in all, quite a number of distractions in all. 

that means i just have to get through this afternoon, all day tomorrow. not as easy as it sounds. wait i have a cheesy novel in my bag, aha, the afternoon’s entertainments just presented itself. 


i just caught the beginning of escape from LA and thought – fact is truly stranger than fiction, everyday i read something else that makes me ponder about the ‘land of the free’ concept…

there is the latest insanity by walmart (don’t these people have anything better to do with their fucking time)

and then there is this brilliant piece in the Progressive Review about the current us adminstration trying to teach the iraqis democracy any thing that begins like this:

Tired of killing Muslims, we are now trying to teach their survivors some democracy.
There are a number of practical problems with this, among them being that the curriculum is in the hands of the most authoritarian, deceitful, anti-democratic, and constitution-wrecking administration we’ve ever had. But there’s an even more disturbing matter: wander around your nation’s capital and try to find something better. Leaving aside anomalies such as the ACLU and the Cato Institute, a few members of Congress, and a handful of anachronic journalists, this town shows virtually no interest in liberty, the Constitution, or democracy these days – except when prescribing them to those in far away lands.

read it in it’s entirety here

and for those of you who wonder where i get a lot of my entertainments, try metafilter (thank you vic)

ooooh, just saw this one truly a woman after my own heart. 

i’m off to keep myself distracted, i don’t seem to have an kind of control over my body, not that i want to, but it’s just so pointless by myself.

i try not to be a chauvanist bastard. and looking at me on a day to day basis i may not seem like much of a fashion maven but guess what i am. scuffy at work, but debonair and dashing when i need to. 🙂

anyway the point of this is, it’s always a pleasure to see well attired people but why spoil it with VPL. i think my problem with it now, is the multiplicity of choices… thongs, boxers, bikinis, tangas, hip huggers, string panties, nothing even. but VPL needs to be banished.

my friend karen has even started the BTPM – burn the panty movement. so i’m not alone here.

so i’ve calmed down considerable, but i still need to figure out a way to vent. i’m still a little to edgy.

it’s time to get a new tattoo, i’m working on a design that extends from my left breast, round my neck to my right shoulder blade. this is going to be last piece for a while but i still have the waves at the base of the spine to finish and i have a general idea what i want but the design isn’t quite coming together yet.

well it’s tuesday night and the wb becons.