Archives For love, lust, longing

too long, too long

June 28, 2003 — Leave a comment

only 20 more days before gets here. 🙂 my god, the dreams, the dreams. i’m still tingling and it’s midafternoon. i’ve been in the office far too many hours already. the print making continues, either i have exceptionally high standards or most people in the business here have no idea how printing operates.

nevermind, i was going to start ranting but iÂ’m trying to extending the good feeling from last nightÂ’s random act of kindness and that truly delicious, sensuous dream. (wouldnÂ’t you like to know)

iÂ’m taking a break while the last of the files save and i managed to squeeze in some tests.

got this one from jadedgrrl and it was too funny not to take, here is my result:




Not Bad

You scored a 32.

You are 43.8% queer.

Well, you are kinda queer, but you still need to work in it a bit.  You only scored in the bottom 50th percentile of queerness.  More than half the world is queerer than you, meaning half the world is having more fun than you.

Others in your queerness category: Pierce Brosnan, Don King, The guy on the Quaker Oats box, Don Johnson,  Dick Van Dyke, your local weatherman, any Asian or guy from Europe.

which makes this result, no surprise:

HASH(0x83a9b98)

You are: Flaming Ernie- Wow, I always wondered why

he liked to hang out with Bert…. I always

thought Bert was the gay one…. Ha-  you

proved that one wrong! Oh well. Gay ppl are

happy ppl…

What F*cked up Sesame Charracter are you?

brought to you by Quizilla

(thanks laura)

and this has been knocking about  js for a couple days now:

entrancing

You have an entrancing kiss~ the kind that leaves

your partner bedazzled and maybe even feeling

he/she is dreaming.  Quite effective; the kiss

that never lessens and always blows your

partner away like the first time.

What kind of kiss are you?

brought to you by Quizilla

and the friday 5 only a day late (but not very applicable):

1. How are you planning to spend the summer [winter] (august vacation in these parts)?

working mostly (but vic is coming here in 20 days. woo hoo)

2. What was your first summer job?

bagging groceries, loved it.

3. If you could go anywhere this summer [winter], where would you go?

anywhere vic and i could hole up for hours and hours alone.

4. What was your worst vacation ever?

none really, i usually find a way to have a good time wherever i am.

5. What was your best vacation ever?

4 days in barbados with vic

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and now some announcements

June 21, 2003 — Leave a comment

this following week (june 19 – july 5) is pride week in trindad you can go here for the list of events.

iÂ’m going with karen tonight to the non-official kickoff of pride week. i always enjoy going out with karen, i have a blast and we can point out all the cute people of any gender to each other. iÂ’m eagerly awating her call. otherwise the evening has been rather uneventful, my primary browser – camino, has flaked out on me completely, it wont launch, reinstalled, dumped the prefs, only thing i can think is i installed divx on my machine and there seems to be a conflict somewhere. owning a mac, there hasnÂ’t been much a chance to seriously geek until x, so iÂ’m gently probing. starting on the periphery and work my way to the root of the problem.

i really like camino, iÂ’ve switched to mozilla temporarily.

amazingly metafilter is down, now where are am i supposed to find all the really cool news?

today is the summer soltice (the longest day of the year in the northern hemisphere) and in pagan worship, i believe this is another high holy day. it does help clarify what iÂ’ve been feeling. a day of power coupled with  the fact that tomorrow will be 9 months since i last saw vic. the combination of these factors has my body in complete and total overdrive. itÂ’s a lovely sensation to be this aware of my own sensuality and desire, but with out vic, itÂ’s painful, on an emotional as well as physical level.

iÂ’m going to watch some tv and try blot out the sensations for a little bit. iÂ’ll be back either before or after karen and i head out.

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today’s flavour is…

June 21, 2003 — Leave a comment

just got out of the shower. have a very long and refreshing shower – body shop grapefruit & lime body wash is divine. i also washed my hair, funny thing in the middle of the wash, rinse, repeat cycle i realised i’d washed my hair last weekend. well, i want to get it neatened this week anyway.
the personal grooming has begun, vic is 27 days away, i’ve already begun the dietary changes. well not changes per say, just a more careful monitoring of what ingest. less dairy, red meat, more fruit, particularly citrus and water. if you don’t what i’m talking about check here (i know i posted this already, but not everyone follows the links) and here. it’s a regular ritual, one which we’ve both found quite successful.
i’m sitting around in my boxers, with my wet hair on my back watching hackers (i’m a sucker for this movie, i’m not sure what i like more the faux-geek speak, the classic apple computers or the very butch angelina jolie) as soon as it’s done, i’m heading off to be a mac god for someone with a 15” lamp imac, it may be the ticket to get my copy of potter this afternoon.
ok, i’m starting to dry off in this heat, time to complete the ritual, no shower/bath is complete without body butter. today’s flavour is…

so many choices…

i chose…

MANGO.

i’m out, off to work for my hp. adieu.

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things masturbation can’t do for you

June 20, 2003 — Leave a comment

today was productive, even with all the distractions of my body. i’m eternally gratefully that it’s just me here today, i don’t think i could have dealt with an office full of women today, it would have been down right embarrassing.

i feel as if my skin aflame. i need to get some ice cream, it’s the only thing i can think of that will subdue my oral fixation. masturbation is like a release valve, but only for one portion of my sexual tension. the ice cream helps, but it lacks a combination of stimuli to even come close.

i’m trying to distract myself and keep working but all my efforts have been unsuccessful. all i can think about it is the sensory overload, hands in my hair, thighs pressed against my ears, eyes closed, the taste, the smell of the goddess overwhelming me.

i need to go home. i’m going to take a very long shower.

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TGIF

June 20, 2003 — Leave a comment

not that it makes a difference, itÂ’s a holiday here and iÂ’m going into work. but i feel great anyway. the dreams, the dreams. my god.

that glow on the horizon in the northwest portion of trinidad is me smiling. i feel that good, by the time vic gets here in 28 days we may both need to have some kind of protective shielding.

iÂ’m calling the embassy today, i think my general demeanour and good feeling will help me get through the beuracracy. need to get some kind of news.

speaking of which:

apple teases us with the new G5s

some recently issued patent gems

the new times 55 fiction winners (a complete story in 55 words)

pubic hair-dos (part 1 of 3 by near experts em & lo from nerve)

itÂ’s about that time for me to get going. iÂ’ll be back later.

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hormone overdrive

June 19, 2003 — Leave a comment

my hormones are in overdrive, not in a bad way.

my skin is tingly, it’s like i can feel every touch with every fibre of my person. everything seems more sensual. it, of course, doesn’t help that my wife is 4 hours by plane and a further 13 hours drive away. but she’ll be here soon. woo hoo!

i just needed to share that before i crawl in to bed.

have a good night all and i hope you all enjoy some form of intimacy with the person you love.

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once again into the breech

June 17, 2003 — Leave a comment

31 DAYS TO VICTORIA GETS HERE

i owe, i owe, so it’s off to work i go.

today is going to be one of sort of work days i like, stuff needing to finished on tight deadlines. i have 3 ads to get out today, but the time i get in my scan should have arrived. logo designs, advertorials (god i hate that word) all due by end of day or first thing in the morning. plus all the planning and stuff for the shoot.

it’s on of those no guts no glory days. i suppose i should be bothered but i think the excitement of victoria coming and all these lovely dreams. i’ve been having the most intimate and exciting dreams, i’m holding on to the joy they bring to take me through the day.

i’ll be back later with details of the day in progress. need to catch my ride.

adieu.

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you bring me joy

June 16, 2003 — Leave a comment

32 DAYS TIL VICTORIA ARRIVES

You bring me joy

When IÂ’m down

Oh, so much joy

When I lose my way your love comes smiling on me

I saw your face

And them I knew

We would be friends

I was so afraid but your arms, theyÂ’d say `come to meÂ’

So IÂ’d say to you

“Can we talk for a while?”

You’d say “alright”

When you love me, I smile

I feel you hands and you feel mine

You bring me joy

You bring me joy

DonÂ’t go too far away

If I canÂ’t see your face, I will remember that smile

But can this be right

Or should we be friends

I get lonely sometimes and IÂ’m mixed up again

‘Cause you’re the finest thing I’ve seen in all my life

You bring me joy

My joy, my joy

I believe this is gonna be what you want it to be

I just love you, I just love you, can`t you see

That youÂ’re the best IÂ’ve seen in all my life

You bring me joy

My joy . . . youÂ’re my joy

My joy . . . my, my joy

Thank you, baby, thank you, baby

I just love you, baby

When I lose my way, your love comes smiling on me

Anita Baker

thank you victoria, for all the joy you bring into my life.

i stayed up til the wee hours of this morning talking to vic and iÂ’m not feeling particularly tired, in fact i feel rejuvenated. itÂ’s usually like this when weÂ’re together, we can stay up for days on end and still be bright eyed and bushy tailed. iÂ’m going to go in early to do some actual time and people management. letÂ’s see how i can get all the stuff i need to get done with the resources at hand (oh wow – management speak, i may actually be good at this)

have a great morning, iÂ’ll be back later with more up details. including if i can lure the sucker (*ahem* artist ) to work today.

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for vic

June 11, 2003 — Leave a comment

good morning love. i miss you more already. this inability to talk during the day feels strange, but it’s for a greater good.
it rain all night and it continues, the sun didn’t come up this morning as much as the grey skies just brightened marginally, i can hear the cars swishing by outside on the wet asphalt and i can only wish you were here. the entire house overslept, on a morning like this everyone is loathe to get out of bed. i hope this brightens your morning. i’ll try to keep posting as the day progresses. i’m trying to keep the meetings to a minimum and the designing high on my time management today.

i love you completely, fiercely, wantonly, have a beautiful day my love

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Cravo E Canela

June 10, 2003 — Leave a comment

here we are couple hours later, 2Gb of new music sorted and categorised. 

i no longer want break something or someone. i didn’t call, because that would have just degenerated into something nasty and unprofessional. and thus far i have been able to keep it professional. 

i think i just need two major projects to get me out of this hole and have enough squirrel away for vic’s visit. 

it’s started raining here and all i can think about is crawling into bed with vic by my side. 

i really hope it rains (pours actually) while she’s here. 

i had a bunch of links that i was going to post but vic just told me about what she wore to work today and the thought of her in a skirt just pushes all coherent thought out of my mind. completely. 

have a good one 

(edited twice after some good natured ribbing) 

going to bed and let the rain on my roof lull me to sleep.

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