Archives For grandmother

on the road again

November 26, 2007 — Leave a comment

i’m heading to trinidad tomorrow afternoon. and there can be only one reason for such a sudden trip. 

interestingly i’m not as freaked out or stressed as when my mother called last week. even my mother seem calmer, 90 plus years is a long and fruitful rally and my grandmother told my mother she was tired. i guess she was ready to move on. i can only hope i’ll live as long as she did. in her lifetime she’s travelled by horse drawn cart, train, automobile and airplane, been witness to the two world wars, communicated via mail, phone and electronically. she had an amazing life and i’m proud to be her grandson. i have her stories to pass on and in that small way i can keep her alive.

weekend update

November 19, 2007 — Leave a comment

a day late and nowhere as funny.

my grandmother is better, home from the hospital suffering from the same complication that put her in there the last time. it’s something that isn’t normally serious but at her age, everything’s serious. but she lives to fight another day.

thanks for all your prayers and good thoughts    


November 14, 2007 — Leave a comment

it’s 5am as i sit here writing this and i’ve know in the back of my mind this day has been coming. it’s not quite here yet, but it’s close enough.  i rarely remember my dreams, but about a month ago, i dreamt my mother called to tell my grandmother was dead. 

i’ve been waiting on that early morning call since then. she’s not dead, but when you’re older than 90, a second trip to the hospital in less than 2 months isn’t good.  i’m worried and sad. but at the same time, the woman i saw a year and a half ago was just a shell of her former self and if it’s her time, then she’s lived a long full life and i’m glad to have been part of her life. 

i have her stories, she’s seen me grow up and i hope and pray that i’m turning into the man she expected.  i’m worried now about my mother, who seems stoic now. i wonder what she’s going to do with herself without my grandmother around. what’s going to keep her motivated and active. i once joked that through all their arguing, they were keeping each other alive, i’m afraid it might be true.

i’m so far away and i feel powerless. i can’t hold my grandmother one last time, i may not even get to do that for my mother. all i can do is wait, i’ve never dreaded a ringing phone so much.