i was reading vic`s post today and the adage “the pen is mightier than the sword” has never been truer.
i look at vic and i see none of the flaws. i see a strong, beautiful talented woman. whose propensity for endless love and kindness never ceases to amaze me. she is the yin to my yang, light to my dark, even in my darkest moment and deepest despair, the thought of victoria, shines forth like a beacon and helps me keep my head up.
i`m not going to play the saint and say i`ve never said hurtful things, to the contrary the most hurtful things i`ve said are to the people i love the most. i`m not a particularly violent person but when i was hurt and angry i would lash out in the most lethal way i knew how. words. i would bottle my rage and frustration and hurt and woe unto the poor soul on the receiving end of a tongue lashing at that moment.
i try not to be that person anymore, but shades of it are still there in snide comments and what passes for witty repartee and brutal honesty. i try to take that breath and think about what i`m going to say when my temples are throbbing and i want to say the most hurtful thing i can think of.
i no longer bottle [much], i`ve learned the value of an honest and humble apology and i have number of good reasons to watch what i say.
Have you ever heard someone say they are LOOKING for love? How does one look for LOVE? Do you think it`s possible? Wouldn`t it be best to let LOVE find YOU?
the harder you look the more elusive it becomes. i think part of it is pheromonal, i mentioned it in this post
no matter how hard you try your efforts are in vain. you find yourself accepting less than what you`re worth when you`re looking for love.
in my experience, love finds you when you least expect it. i met vic online, we started chatting, daily and the rest as they say is history.
i was looking for a friend, i found a friend, a companion, a love, a wife.
learn about mr. snaffleburger and the corporation right here.
CONFORM!
CONSUME!
OBEY!
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mr. snaffleburger
If your mate asked you to make a home sex video with them, would you consider it or have you done it? What are views on this? Would you do it again?
with vic there is almost nothing that i`d be unwilling to try. but i don`t think either of us are of the video making sort. our stimuli are actually more intangible and can`t be captured on video.
and i`ve never felt the urge to make a video with anyone else.
i don`t think i`m any position to judge anyone for anything they do in the privacy of their home.
i will eat grapes but i draw the line there. i don`t drink grape soda, grape colour juice and sure as fucking hell grape koolaid. does not pass my lips.
in november 1978, in jonestown, guyana; jim jones convinced 900 plus of his followers to drink a lethal grape juice cocktail. for a a seven year old, that kind of news is enough to make you swear off grape juice. i was an avid reader and had an over-active imagination. besides guyana was our neighbour, it wasn`t far like the US, it was right there, next door to us on the map. so here i am, a quarter of a century later, still not drinking anything grape coloured.
i wonder why people feel the need to be lead. jonestown, waco, heaven`s gate. were these people`s lives so devoid of meaning that they were willing to sacrifice themselves and their children on the say so of one person?
oh wait, hmmmmm, i see a pattern. nevermind.
the snaffleburger corporation says: CONFORM! CONSUME! OBEY!
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grape, kool-aid, suicide cults, jonestown
After a passionate lovemaking session, the last thing a woman wants is for you to turn your back on her and begin a private snore fest. (I know the women feel me) What better way to cleanse yourselves after a hot, sweaty episode than showering together? There is no better time to communicate with one another than after a mutually gratifying sexual experience.
What kinds of things do you do with your partner after LOVEMAKING?
what else is there to do, but start again. 🙂
vic and i find the smell of our lovemaking quite sensual, so there is no rushing into the shower. we`re usually both exhausted so we just wrap ourselves up and go to sleep.
the quarterly update of the OED is out
among the new entries:
blamestorming
bluetooth
cilantro
and the ever useful, fuckwit.
wonder when we`ll see that as word of the day?
or should that be when?
i was looking at some photographs over the weekend online. i`ve been thinking about doing some portraits lately. i`m tired of seeing, what in my opinion is, an unrealistic portrait of the female form.
i know a lot of women and none of them fits the barbie mould. Tall, short, thick, thin, products of their genetic heritage, beautiful outright or radiating that special `je ne c`est quoi`. they are all stunning in their own right.
so why it is, specifically in the caribbean we seemed to be represented by this US ideal. long flowing hair, huge bust and tiny stick legs. it`s no who we are. it irks me every time i see one of the ms [insert misogynistic cattle call here] show contestants. who are they representing?
i have two daughters, i think they could have fit in a size 0 about two years ago. i know enough adults that have grown up before the current fashion trends with their own body issues, what`s going to happen to my young women.
there is already a fashion designer in trinidad, who has stated openly that he doesn`t make clothes for fat people. what he really means is unless you`re shaped like a plank you can`t wear his clothes. it`s easy enough to say fuck him and not buy his clothes but it`s the thinking that allows him to say something like that.
i clearly understand that there are different body types but when did one specific type become the ideal?
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body image, fashion
i had to get out of the apartment today. it was driving me insane. i got up early this morning, did a few laps in the pool, came back upstairs made breakfast, sorted out the mailbox on my computer and it was only 10am.
i couldn`t face another day of just sitting around there doing nothing. i get very agitated when i have nothing to do and it`s not like i have my friends to call and hang out with. having all this time on my hands is frustrating.
i think it can summed up in one word, lonely. it seems so complete. i`ve gone through this before, so i know i can survive it, but why does it seems so insurmountable now.
i need to find something to do with my time. so that the hours stop crashing against me like this. i suppose when i get an internet connection at home it will keep me better occupied, but i need to get out more.
i went out to the opening of a new club on friday night, not necessarily because it`s something i enjoyed, but it was better than sitting around at home and doing nothing. i`m not a particularly big fan of crowds and i think my days for sweatily rubbing up against people are pretty much over.
ok enough bitching. going to look for some software so i can use my palm as a remote for my tv.
i had to get out of the apartment today. it was driving me insane. i got up early this morning, did a few laps in the pool, came back upstairs made breakfast, sorted out the mailbox on my computer and it was only 10am.
i couldn`t face another day of just sitting around there doing nothing. i get very agitated when i have nothing to do and it`s not like i have my friends to call and hang out with. having all this time on my hands is frustrating.
i think it can summed up in one word, lonely. it seems so complete. i`ve gone through this before, so i know i can survive it, but why does it seems so insurmountable now.
i need to find something to do with my time. so that the hours stop crashing against me like this. i suppose when i get an internet connection at home it will keep me better occupied, but i need to get out more.
i went out to the opening of a new club on friday night, not necessarily because it`s something i enjoyed, but it was better than sitting around at home and doing nothing. i`m not a particularly big fan of crowds and i think my days for sweatily rubbing up against people are pretty much over.
ok enough bitching. going to look for some software so i can use my palm as a remote for my tv.
