Archives For love, lust, longing

sexy soccer mom

October 11, 2003 — Leave a comment

vic and the boy chick are off playing soccer [or football as i know it] and i find the thought of her being a soccer mom, very arousing.

it`s one of the things about victoria that appeals to me. she`s multifaceted. she`s not just one thing. she`s a mother, my lover, my wife, a friend, our accountant, a healer and all of these things she does exceptionally well.

the power and ease with which she does all these things are truly an aphrodisiac. the wanton, lascivious woman who makes me scream out her names, is the same woman i`m honoured to co-parent with, is the woman i can just on the couch and read with. she is all of these things, separately and together it makes her the woman i married.

what more can i ask for. i`m proud, honoured and blessed to have vic in my life.

i can taste you

October 9, 2003 — Leave a comment

with the waxing of the moon, our desires build. it`s amazing, even separated as we are, we`re still synchronised. there is nothing to say, we know, we can feel. the tingle of skin, the ghosts of sensations past and longing for days yet upon us.

the elaborate fantasies, the beautiful stories, the spectacular dreams, inflame our passions, but self stimulation only serves to frustrate. barely an outlet, it`s becomes pointless.

i hear ghosts of our lovemaking, murmurs, whispers, shouts, screams, i can smell you, i long for your touch. the need for you touches my very soul.

true beauty

October 7, 2003 — Leave a comment

i`ve been fortunate enough in my long term relationships to be involved with some truly stunning women.

i guess you could say i have a type, if you can call it that. it`s all in the posture. i lean towards statuesque women, but not just big for the sake thereof. but women who were strong and confident in their own bodies.

it`s all in the shoulders. you can see it from the very first time you meet them. one of my pet peeves are women who slouch, you can see it in the slumped shoulders, bad, bad form. the women i`m attracted to stand proudly chin up, shoulders thrown back, powerful in their womanhood.

i consider myself blessed to have been able share these in these lives.

and now i have vic who embodies everything i find desirable. i call her my equal but i think i may be blowing my own horn a bit. she`s brilliant, beautiful, talented, funny. i may be some of these things but i think vic far exceeds all these qualities in me.

victoria is a true beauty. she is kind, generous, loving, thoughtful, an amazing all round person and i`m glad she`s part of my life. even apart the thought of her gets me through each day, makes my heart sing and gives me the strength to face each day with the certainty that we will be together.

Technorati Tags:

it’s all in the details

September 29, 2003 — Leave a comment

but sometimes you need to focus on the big picture. ignore the little shit and appreciate how amazing life is.

i have a woman that i love with every fibre of my being and who loves in the same way. we have friends that support us and help us through the rough times unstintingly.

this is all you need. all else will fall into place. no matter how rough, how strange the trip seems.

we are blessed. we will prevail. together.

it`s become a chore.

the fantasies and memories are there, but it just goes on and on. it`s not a pleasurable act anymore, it more like a bodily function.

besides, there is nothing that helps my oral fixation either. a woman once told me, i should not eat ice cream in public. so i`m a little self conscious about that, actually, that`s not entirely true, i just don`t want to be picking up strange people on the side of the road, because of how i eat ice cream.

this isn`t helping.

aaah, the anti-sex thought – my boss and my office.

time to go.

Technorati Tags:
,

full moon, harvest moon

September 11, 2003 — Leave a comment

it`s the full moon tonight and i can feel it, my body is singing.

i can feel it in my every nerve ending. it`s such a magnificent feeling. i`m almost bouncing off the walls.

i came home today to find a letter from the bank…

blah, blah, blah… we thank you for your interest…

… however we`re unable to offer you a suitable position…

blah, blah, blah

doesn`t fucking matter, i`m fixed on this jamaica job. i can taste it. i want it so badly.

or is that something else? 🙂 just had a long conversation with vic about this long conversation i had with my boss today.

i guess i should expect the next couple of weeks to be filled with many such meeting as she tries to convince me staying is what`s best for me.

poor deluded soul.

i`m going to make it an early night tonight. hope your harvest moon is fruitful.

i dream in stereo

September 5, 2003 — Leave a comment

and i dream about sex.

lord do i dream about sex, of late my dreams have been partially of the last time i saw vic and fantasies based around the visit. loud sweaty sex, slow tender lovemaking, raw fucking, trying to devour each other, kissing, licking, sucking, nibbling, biting, moaning, screaming, seeing stars sex.

i like sex. no that`s an understatement, i love sex, i adore sex. and now i`ve found vic and we have a sexual chemistry that is amazing. it`s more than physical, there`s a mental bond. from the first time to the last time, it`s just gotten better and better.  

my dreams are filled with textures and sounds and smells and tastes. i get up most mornings in shock that i`m alone in the bed because my dreams are so vivid. i have a tangible longing for vic, the taste of her skin, the feel of her skin against mine, our bodies intertwined, our voices intertwined. the changes in position, in tempo without thought, without words, just the two of us lost in each other, knowing.

that`s what i miss, that`s what i long for. masturbation can`t satisfy that kind of longing. and there is now way to recreate the feel of thighs pressed against my ear, vic`s hands in my hair, a melange of sensations – aural, tactile, redolent, palatable, visual, emotional…

i want it now. everyday. i don`t want to wake up alone anymore.

Technorati Tags:

calling it a night

August 27, 2003 — Leave a comment

i`m wiped physically and emotionally. i feel so completely drained.

i just want to curl in bed with vic, i want her in my arms.

is that too much to ask?

i should be working

August 15, 2003 — Leave a comment

but i needed an outlet…

the tingle is now an insistent buzzing in my brain [well, not only my brain but let`s not go there]. i`m sitting here with a smile on my face that is somewhere between whimsy and lasciviousness.

it`s an interesting sensation, being aroused like this, there are moments when my senses experience what can only be accounted for as ghosting, it`s like vic is here, but just out of reach.

i`m going to try and get back to work or at least sit at my desk for a little while. if i can just figure out how to shut my my biggest erogenous zone off.

you fill my thoughts waking and asleep. my heart skips a beat, a smile crosses my face with every thought of you. i love your mind, your idiosyncrasies, your lasciviousness and most i love that we call all these things ours.

i love you completely.

Technorati Tags: