our chief weapon is suprise

February 3, 2004 — Leave a comment

i`m up far too early. it`s begun again. i`ve been getting up at 5am unable to go back to sleep. i lay in the bed, do breathing exercises, think calm thoughts, zip. i just end up laying there and eventually i get up and end up on the computer.

i need all the sleep i can get at this stage, i`m staring down the barrel of another 12 or 13 hour day today and it`s intricate work. i`m tried, perpetually, i haven`t had a full, restive night`s sleep since last wednesday. i wonder why?

i know my body, it`s going to start catching up with me, it already has. coupled with this extremely long week that`s already in progress, my landlady wants to start showing the apartment, which means i need to clean up to some extent. but who wants to sweep after 12 hours in the office. i think i`ve found a nice old lady to clean my apartment this week, get that out of the way, it doesn`t need pre-cleaning, it just needs to be swept and mopped. i keep a fairly clean apartment, i just haven`t felt like doing much of anything lately, hence the need to have someone come in and clean.

i`m tired and my thoughts are jumbled and at this point i need to be able to focus on my adventures today.

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