same sith, different day

May 19, 2005 — Leave a comment

I thought I would stay up after I got home from the midnight showing to write my review while it was fresh in my mind, but then I thought I wasn`t going to say anything new and if the turnout last night at the movie theatre was any indication, there were more fervent worshippers at the altar of the force than I. Episode III: Revenge of the Sith is the sixth film in George Lucas` epic space opera; Star Wars, however chronologically it precedes the original Star Wars movie; now named Episode IV: A New Hope; released in 1977. Ep. III: ROTS, chronicles the fall of the Jedi Knights and the rise of the Galactic Empire and the consummate villain, Darth Vader.

Let`s get this clear, I did enjoy the movie, but i had to make certain allowances; Hayden Christensen still can`t act his way through a moist towelette, Natalie Portman wasted in ugly costumes and George Lucas` inability to create a realistic love interest.

Christensen, first introduced to audiences in the vomit inducing Episode II, has churned out sickeningly mediocre performances over the course of two movies, leaving you wishing that he`d become Vader already instead of being such a whiney brat.

The beautiful and talented, Natalie Portman is also wasted in a series of progressively uglier costume and hair changes over the course of two movies, you`re almost grateful that she dies at the end of this movie and doesn`t pass on her horrid fashion sense to her daughter Princess Leia, well except for really bad `bun hair`. George Lucas seems incapable of writing of directing a love scene without it having it feel puerile and juvenile, makes you wonder how this man reproduced, you would think a man capable of imagining a universe full of such fantastic characters could draw on some real life inspiration that would make love between Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christensen) and Padmé (Natalie Portman) seem less like a cheesy Barbara Cartland romance or a douche commercial.

Episode III was dark and from the previews it looked as if Lucas had finally channelled his inner Kershner; Irvin Kershner was responsible one of the only two movies in the series not directed by Lucas and believe to be the best film of the series; Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back. Lucas did manage to channel some Kershner but saddled it with all of his baggage. The movie was a visual effects spectacular with all manner of space craft, battles in space and a completely CG villain; General Grievous. Because it was so dark and carries a PG-13 rating, the movie was not overly burdened with the need to have something cute for the kiddies, although there were only two scenes that I think would be perturbing to small children. I think you`d have more trouble having them keeping still for the two hour and twenty six minute run time and some of the seizure inducing fight sequences.

I`m going back at some point not because I feel a continued need to line LucasFilms` pockets but having vetted it for content for my nine-year old audience, I need to accompany him. If you haven`t seen it and you`re not a Star Wars fan, you can wait for cable or DVD and if you are a fan, you can probably wait as well. It doesn`t disappoint but not as much as it doesn`t overwhelm.

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