Quality, value, style,
service, selection, convenience,
economy, savings, performance
low rates, friendly service,
name brands, easy terms,
affordable prices, money-back guarantee,
Free admission, free appraisal, free alterations,
free delivery, free estimates,
free home trial–and free parking.
No cash? No problem. No kidding!
No fuss, no muss, no risk, no obligation,
no red tape, no down payment,
no entry fee no hidden charges,
no purchace necessary,
no one will call on you,
no payments or interest till September.
Limited time only, though,
so act now,
send no money,
offer good while supplies last,
two to a customer,
each item sold separately,
batteries not included,
mileage may vary,
all sales are final,
allow six weeks for delivery,
some items not available,
some assembly required,
some restrictions may apply.
So come on in for a free demonstration and a free consultation with our friendly, professional staff. Our experienced and knowledgeable sales representatives, will help you make a selection that`s just right for you and just right for your budget.
And don`t forget to pick up your free gift: A classic, deluxe, custion, designer, luxury, prestige, high-quality, premium, select, gourmet pocket pencil sharpener. Yours for the asking, no purchace necessary. It`s our way of saying thank you.
– George Carlin