on how bad ‘underworld’ was

September 25, 2003 — Leave a comment

one of the nice things about trinidad is that you can still catch a double feature here for under $15 if you`re so inclined and last night i was treated to underworld and once upon a time in mexico.

based on the title you can gather i didn`t like underworld, i`m still coming to grips with why. i`m not a movie snob, i can appreciate lowbrow fare with the rest of the masses but underworld just irked me on so many levels.

if 15 minutes into the movie, in one of the first on many action sequences all you can think is `you`ve just fired 72 rounds of ammo, motherfucker, hit something!` you know you`re missing something and it just got worse from there, i know some of the characters are supposed to be the undead, but i think i`m seen more lifelike portrayals from mannequins.

another thing that pissed me off, i understand you`re trying to create your own world and the like, but you`re drawing from the pool of pop culture and there are certain things are just part of the mythos. the scene with the lead character standing in front of a mirror, just served to make the movie even less entertaining.

i could probably go on, but i wont. the movie was cliched, hackney and could have been better scripted by my daughter. the screenwriters need to publicly flogged, but then if that was the criteria, almost anybody that had a hand in any of most of the big budget movies over the last… [pick a time frame] deserves a public flogging anyway

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