i had a panic attack today, actually multiple attacks. this is new for me, i`ve never felt anything so paralysing and debilitating. i was supposed to go out this afternoon. i just lay in my bed and shook, i couldn`t find the strength to do anything.
i`m not sure where this came from, some of it is me, but i think some of it`s vic, worried about her job. our finances. just all the shit most couple have to put up with. but we`re dealing with it in duality.
what`s most worrying is most of the time we have our meltdowns seperately. and we`re there for each other, but they seem to be getting closer together and i`m afraid they`re going to converge and coincide.
i`m just so tired, my stomach is doing little flip flops. i just need to keep it together this week. i think once i know the situation with this job this sense of impending doom may pass.