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sex and sensuality

November 14, 2008 — Leave a comment

this was something i wrote 5 years ago, it still holds so true.

sex has become a commodity and seems to be daily losing it`s value.

sex is being used to sell everything, slowly we`re becoming more and more inured. what were once alternative lifestyles have become mainstream. i have no issues with this. i live for the day when my gay/bi/whatever friends can walk the streets without fear of repercussions.

what i resent is them becoming a tool for marketing and advertising companies. i resent being branded or compartmentalised.

let`s take the whole `metrosexual` thing, i`m a man confident in my own sexuality, that takes care of my body, am able to cook a meal of more than one course and i have a sense of style and some hack sat down in a room and thought how can i capture this market. aha, let`s brand them, put them in a nice little niche. i don`t think so.

i am me. i don`t need someone to tell me who i am and what`s sexy. and sadly for that very same reason there is very little that is truly sexy or maybe i`m just too cynical.

i enjoy sensuality, particularly for the reason that it plays on all your senses. the feel of fruit in your hands, the taste of a good meal, the smell of the sea. it`s not  just about breasts and asses and cocks and cunts.

sensuality begins in the mind.

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it’s been on my mind… 

for vic 
and an article that i’ve been looking for ages, recorded here for prosperity – the taste of a woman 

NERVE QUOTE OF THE DAY: 
“The womb of a woman is in the numbers of the insatiable things mentioned in the Scriptures. I cannot tell whether there is anything in the world its greediness may be compared unto; neither hell fire nor the earth being so devouring, as the privy parts of a lascivious woman.” -Dr. Nicholas de Venette, quoted in the The Mysteries of Love Revealed, 18th century 

i’ve been cruising about various message boards and it saddens me to see just how homophobic and repressed my people are. i have a healthy attitude towards sex and i’m blessed with a partner who has one too, we’re able to communicate our desires with each other with out shame or fear. but as i read various posts, i wonder what makes me so different. i grew up here, i received the same education but i don’t think like my people. it’s so strange, i feel like such an outsider sometimes. a daily newspaper ran the same sex marriage story as a subhead yesterday and the whole country is in an uproar. religious leaders are talking out of their ass. and it’s not even here. 

sometime ago i’d written a commentary about abortion, i think the same principles apply, so i’m going to post it here: 

Let repression reign 
“Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For by the standard you judge you will be judged, and the measure you use will be the measure you receive. 
Why do you see the speck in your brother’s eye, but fail to see the beam of wood in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me remove the speck from your eye,’ while there is a beam in your own? 
You hypocrite! First remove the beam from your eye, and then you can see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” 
— Matthew Chapter 7 verses 1 – 5
 

Sunday saw the Catholic non-govermental organisation, Emmanuel Community’s anti-abortion march. The march was in direct response to an appeal by ASPIRE (Advocates for Safe Parenthood: Improving Reproductive Equity) for the repeal of the current abortion legislation. 

The Emmanuel Community and the Catholic Church believe that the legalisation of abortion is detrimental to the quality of life. 
Funny, I would have thought that both poverty and pedophelia would be detrimental to the quality of life as well. Where was the Emmanuel Community march then? 

Call me a cynic but I don’t think these people should have the nerve to talk about the quality of life. What we need at the beginning of the third millenia is education and discourse, not the Catholic Church and their mouthpieces spouting the same moral diatribe that continues to promote abuse and poverty. 

The male dominated Catholic Church and members of IRO appear to be living in some sort of time and testosterone warped reality where a woman’s role is to be subservient to her man and stay home and bear children. One Anglican bishop went so far as to say “Women shouldn’t be given a choice”. 

What is even more saddening is these same IRO leaders have also objected to sex education and the introduction of condoms in high schools claiming the free distribution of condoms would give rise to promiscuity in the society. One of their major arguments against legalising abortion is that it will be used as a form of contraception. The people who use abortion as a form of contraception are already doing so. 

Legalised abortion and contraception is not a carte blanche for sexual activity. 

My other problem specifically with the Emmanuel Community is who are they to be advising people on sexuality and the reprecussions thereof? They should get their own house in order before they bring their weight and judgment to bear. This same repression of sexuality and any discourse on it is at the root of the rampant sexual abuse within the Catholic Church. How can you preach to entire societies on sexual mores and abstinence when your own exemplars are using their power to sexually abuse children? 

My other concern with the Emmanuel Community and their march is how in touch are these people with the day to day realities of living in Trinidad & Tobago? A cross section of the people gathered at the Jean Pierre Complex yesterday afternoon included the more affluent portions of the populace—the sort of people who can afford a quick visit to their ob/gyn or a private medical clinic to perform a legal D&C or D&E, if pregnancy is not in their plans. 

Maybe if they weren’t able to hide behind the legality of having money they would be singing a different tune. 
What these people need to realise is that young people in this country are having sex and rather than taking some moral high ground and frowning upon them, we need to be providing them with sensible and detailed information, to help them make the right choices themselves. 

how did we get here. sigh. i started off with such good intentions and then i got sidetracked. go forth and be tolerant.