talk about withdrawl

i got up this morning, with a multitude of thoughts to post on the last day of the year and nothing. js was down so i couldn`t get my fix.

i guess it`s all for the best. another year is wrapping up. another 358 days without vic [well it would have been 365 but for the week she spent in trinidad, do the fucking math].

things that really upset me tend to be blotted from my mind and since i can remember what i did last year for old years then it must have been really upsetting.

i`m trying to be positive and more focussed, more sociable [i have an invite to go out to see ROTK tonight and i think i may just pass, i don`t want to be around people i don`t know, much less make friends and try to like].

i don`t make resolutions, so there are no big speeches and plans for the new year, oh with exception of attempting atkins starting jan 2. why not january 1 you ask? i have a ticket for what is supposed to be one of the best all inclusive parties of the year and since i don`t have to go to work on friday, i can get stinkingly drunk and hope it lasts the whole weekend.

my other plan for the new year is to cut off all these fuckers that i called friends that didn`t the plain old good manners to reply to my christmas greeting, i think i put up with enough shit from my so called friends in 2003, new year, new perspective: if you can`t remember my number or email address when things are going well, i really don`t give a fuck what your problems are.

my free will astrology came today and this is what is said:

One of your most wonderful qualities is your aptitude for helping people. It`s also the part of your nature that is most likely to be abused by charming narcissists and charismatic manipulators. But in 2004, you will have a knack for freeing yourself from these oppressors. You`ll be able to spot potential new ones from a mile away, and you`ll know how to break the hold that the old ones have on you. Take this pledge now: \”I will serve only the smart, effective people who also serve me.\”

and that is my philosophy for the new year.