it’s like fucking christmas, i haven’t been up this early in a long time. i so need to get a fucking life. 

so i’m bright eyed and bush tailed, dispensing fashion and relationship advice early in the morning. 
i seem to excel at giving advice, but i can’t follow my own for fucking hell. i call it the sisyphus complex (for those of you who don’t know he was, according to homer (go look it up, i can’t explain everything), the wisest and most prudent of mortals but was condemned by the gods to ceaselesly roll a rock to the top of a mountain whence it would roll back down and the process would begin anew) 
anyway the crux of this theory is – i can see other people’s problems (or rock) clearly because i have perspective, but in my own life, i’m standing behind the rock, so i all i know it is continually an uphill battle. but sometimes more often than not you need to step away and seize up the size of the rock, cause what you believe to be a boulder might in fact be a pebble. 

on this note i would like to believe i have some perspective in my life, but based on my rollercoaster emotional state i doubt that very much. again, i’m try to hold on to the joys in my life and let that be my focal point, i still haven’t heard from santo domingo, but i will in due course, sitting at home and mulling over it, is not going let the process go by any faster. i’m not getting the other cushy job (they have no budget – i believe they may have over extended themselves in an effort to keep one of their current art directors) but i have a free reign at the job i do have and i’m doing work that i can be proud of. 

speaking of which one of the directors of the company came in about a week after i started working there, show me an ad that had been reproduced elsewhere and he wanted to liberate elements for an ad he wanted built for another company he run. yes, he plagerised (that’s actually being polite) and now he’s been caught and catching flak for it. and by some extension so am i, because people talk, what’s funny is that in this culture where people have no respect for the work of others, people are point and staring and laughing but a patently guilty of the same thing. i would think (and this is just me), if you too had cocoa in the sun you would want to be a little more circumspect about pointing and laughing. (how many fucking metaphors did i mix there – jesus, i need to get some more control over my thoughts) 

i said last night that i had a lot of shit to talk about, well that was some of it. there is a lot more, but i really need to get to work now, i have to make sure everything i need to do is done before i leave this morning. 

have a great one.

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